To all concerned,
Some sections of the media and some film industry people are speculating that my daughter Jiah committed suicide because of depression related to her career. However the truth is that it happened only because of the trauma and the abuse she suffered at the hands of Suraj Pancholi and his father Aditya Pancholi.
This I know from what Jiah shared with her sisters and me and also from this letter written by Jiah herself that I am attaching here with which was found three days later by my younger daughter in a wallet box belonging to Jiah when she was searching for some poems written by Jiah to be read out at her prayer meeting.
I have decided to make this letter public so that everyone may know the truth behind my daughter’s tragedy.
Below given is a transcript of Jiah's handwritten letter:.. I am also attaching the photocopies of the actual handwritten pages of her letter
Yours truly
Rabiya khan
Rabiya khan
Jiah's letter to Suraj pancholi
“ I don’t know how to say this to you but I might as well now as I have nothing to lose. I’ve already lost everything. If you’re reading this I might have already left or about to leave. I am broken inside. You may not have known this but you affected me deeply to a point where I lost myself in loving you. Yet you tortured me everyday. These days I see no light I wake up not wanting to wake up. There was a time I saw my life with you, a future with you. But you shattered my dreams. I feel dead inside. I’ve never given so much of myself to someone or cared so much. You returned my love with cheating and lies. It didn’t matter how many gifts I gave you or how beautiful I looked for you. I was scared of getting pregnant but I gave myself completely the pain you have caused me everyday has destroyed every bit of me, destroyed my soul. I can’t eat or sleep or think or function. I am running away from everything. The career is not even worth it anymore. When I first met you I was driven, ambitious and disciplined. Then I fell for you, a love I thought would bring out the best in me. I don’t know why destiny brought us together. After all the pain, the rape, the abuse, the torture I have seen previously I didn’t deserve this. I didn’t see any love or commitment from you. I just became increasingly scared that you would hurt me mentally or physically. Your life was about partying and women. Mine was you and my work. If I stay here I will crave you and miss you. So I am kissing my 10-year career and dreams goodbye. I never told you but I received a message about you. About you cheating on me. I chose to ignore it, decided to trust you. You embarrassed me. I never went out, I never went with anyone else. I am a loyal person. I never met anyone with Karthik I just wanted you to feel how you make me feel constantly. No other woman will give you as much as I did or love you as much as I did. I can write that in my blood. Things were looking up for me here, but is it worth it when you constantly feel the pain of heartbreak when the person you love wants to abuse you or threatens o hit you or cheats on you telling other girls they are beautiful or throws you out of their house when you have no where to go and you’ve come to them out of love or when they lie to your face or they make you chase after them in their car. Or disrespects their family. You never even met my sister. I bought your sister presents. You tore my soul. I have no reason to breathe anymore. All I wanted was love. I did everything for you. I was working for us. But you were never my partner. My future is destroyed my happiness snatched away from me. I always wished the best for you, was ready to invest what little money I had in your betterment. You never appreciated my love, Kicked me in the face. I have no confidence or self esteem left, whatever talent whatever ambition you took it all away. You destroyed my life. It hurt me so much that I waited for you for ten days and you didn’t bother buying me something. The Goa trip was my birthday present but even after you cheated I still spent on you. I aborted our baby when it hurt me deeply. You destroyed my Christmas and my birthday dinner when I came back. When I tried my hardest to make your birthday special. You chose to be away from me on Valentines Day. You promised me once we made it to one year we would get engaged. All you want in life is partying, your women and your selfish motives. All I wanted was you and my happiness you took both away from me. I spent money on you selflessly you would throw in my face. When I would cry for you. I have nothing left in this world to live for after this. I wish you had loved me like I loved you. I dreamt of our future. I dreamt f our success. I leave this place with nothing but broken dreams and empty promises. All I want now is to go to sleep and never wake up again. I am nothing. I had everything. I felt so alone even while with you. You made me feel alone and vulnerable. I am so much more than this”
I can understand the pain she was going through - rape, cheating, pregnancy, abortion, their father leaving and never calling them, etc. But, hey, why lose "YOUR" life for someone else? The best way to reply him back was to dump him and get successful in life by not giving him a c***. There was your mother and sisters who loved you a lot more, cared about you and to them you meant a lot - why could not you live for them? Why hurt the people who gave you so much in life? Why kill yourself for someone who never cared about you because killing yourself does not make you a hero - do not make the jerk win - do not be a coward by taking the easy way out - live your life to the fullest - your life is your life - no one has the right to RULE it - fight back.
ReplyDeleteRemember, suicide is a long lasting cowardly solution for "temporary" problems.
To all the girls out there, as soon as you realize that you are dating/in a relationship with "THE" wrong guy, please for heaven's sake dump them ASAP - do not wait and watch - do not harm yourself because of them - it is YOUR life - no one has the right to destroy it. Do not get blinded by men girls :/ Have some PRIDE, leave the LOSER. It is too bad that the Pancholis are immature and they need to learn a lesson.
"My Son is Not the Villain" --- Yeah, you want me to believe that?
Dear Jiah,
ReplyDeleteYou have been through a lot. I am sorry that the 'thing' Suraj was doing to you was called love by him. The only love that you every received was by your family. Suraj was just an abuser not a lover.
I hope where ever you are, you will find love and that you are with your child now.
For someone who loves another deeply, nothing in the world seems difficult to do. Lovers have one focus and that is each other. And it hurts badly when someone breaks you’re feeling, time and time over again. For someone with all those lovely feeling it’s an unbearable pain to handle. They pain you have must felt, by making a choice for abortion. As far as I can judge you where a great, daughter, sister, friend and lover. You have accomplished all these roles in life, and not many can say that.
I hope for those who are saying, that if she had someone to talk, then she still would be here.
Jiah felt like an failure, and nobody likes to talk about their failures. Although in our eyes she wasn't a failure, but a true lover.
For all those people who take love for granted, I hope the Jiah story opens your eyes.
Accept the love that someone gives you. If you don’t wanted it, be honest and she NO.
But don’t play with anyone’s feeling, cause it’s the biggest gift you can receive.
very heart-wrenching indeed... poor gal went through so much.. may her soul RIP n i am sure the guy will neva rest in peace here after.
ReplyDeleteOMG!!! I'm speechless after reading this!! I really wish she had stayed alive and hung on. Life's a teacher, it teaches you both the good and the bad. It depends on you as a student to decide how you handle your lessons. Rest in peace Jiah, I hope you've found the peace you craved for.
ReplyDeleteThat Pancholi guy might as well kiss his career goodbye after all this.